And It All Came Tumbling Down

Last night I was awoken by a loud BANG! It sounded as if someone had thrown open my door against my bedroom wall, entered and fired a shot gun. In my hazy state of semi-consciousness I found myself lying paralyzed in fear. Granted, my thought process would have been different at 3pm as opposed to 3am; nevertheless, there I lay completely still until I was able to fall asleep again.

When my alarm rang at 5:33am to go running, I glanced over my shoulder and saw the source of the big BANG … my closet shelf had broken and 82 hangers full of dresses, jackets and tops (mostly black) had come crashing down with a number of previously meticulously organized photo boxes. It looked like an acme bomb had exploded.

The whole scene was the final detail needed to illustrate something which I have been considering the last few weeks: The blessedness of possessing nothing.

It is such a simple statement but so difficult to truly act on. As I was clearing away the refuge from my closet bomb I counted 15 pairs of jeans, 35 pairs of shoes and nearly 75 empty hangers waiting to be used. Notably some of my wardrobe has been diligently preserved since the sixth grade (my grandmother would be proud); still, the challenge remains for me to reconcile having so much with my intimate knowledge of the desperate reality facing so many others with whom I share this unique place as a part of Humanity.

The desperate reality cannot simply be dismissed as, “Africa” or “poverty” or “Third World” because last Saturday morning I spent three hours in a superhero costume at Restore Orlando, a local urban ministry for kids located ten miles from my home. I held real children on my lap, I ran relay races with them, I watched as they ate turkey dogs in the park. I was fully present in their reality- and it looked so much different from mine.



St. Augustine said, “Thou hast formed us for Thyself, and our hearts are restless till they find rest in Thee.” Yet, there seem to be so many other alternatives in which I find my rest. I have often times ended up serving the very things which were created to be subservient to me.

I know counting out the clothing in my closet is an overly simplified approach; but, it seemed to accurately represent my dilemma. My closet crash left me lying paralyzed in fear.

It is tempting to completely nullify the dilemma with the argument that owning clothing in and of it self is not bad, but I have even been challenged on that notion as of late. At what point should I reconcile the quantity of clothing, or whatever luxury it is, that I own with my knowledge of the deprivation of the most basic needs facing my fellow members of Humanity in my own city and abroad.

Words like hungry, naked and homeless actually describe people living very near me. And, to an even more extreme standard they describe millions of children living around the world.

I am not saying that everyone should strive to live just above the poverty line. I return to the notion of the blessedness of possessing nothing. I want to—no, I need to—be just as ready, willing, and excited to invest my resources into the lives of the poor as I am about a purchasing a killer new pair of shoes. More so, I need to invest the same time and energy to intentionally seek out the needs of others as I do to peruse the shoe department.

With that being understood, today I am asking myself if there is anything in my life which, should it come crashing down, would engulf me in fear? Do I possess anything so much that I would not be ready to freely surrender it for the sake of another?

I am assured it will be a lifelong question as well as a quest for the freedom afforded by the blessedness of possessing nothing.

Related Readings:
A.W. Tozer The Pursuit of God
John Piper A Hunger for God

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